Monday, August 20, 2012

New Blog...

I have a new blog....rather I have moved from Blogger to WordPress.

You can read the new posts here:

Thursday, March 29, 2012

Day in Review - Back to the Grind

Well, I am back from was a great trip.  If you didn't see the posts (or skipped them because they were so boring) you will know that we had a wonderful visit to the sunshine state that was filled with food (I put on 4 pounds) drinks (see previous 4 pound note) sun (will get to this in a moment) and fun.

I missed my little doggie but she was in good hands. She spent the week playing with her cousins Lily and Josie.  (As a side note, she has been sleeping about 20 hours a day since we got home. She is either exhausted or depressed)
She caught me taking the picture!

So the best news out of this whole trip was that "Todd" and "Sarah" bought a beautiful home in Bradenton. It was definitely unexpected but I absolutely believe that it was meant to be. They spent my inheritance on this house but I guess I will get some use out of it since it is a free place to stay in sunny Florida. It is in an "older adult" (Old people) private community but us young ens' can stay for up to 30 days each year. The truth is, it is right on the shores of a gorgeous lagoon, the neighbors are far enough away to be comfortable and it will be a wonderful retreat for the entire family. (Let me know if you want to rent it for a week, season, whatever...I will put you in touch with "Todd")

If I wasn't afraid of the little lizards everywhere, I would sit by those palms and write

Let's talk about my sunburn for a minute.  Before anyone preaches to me about wearing sunscreen...i DID...I just neglected to reapply after going into the ocean and rinsing off in the shower (my legs).  Aside from my legs, the rest of my body was perfectly fine and even got a bit of color. So this sunburn was bad...being outside all day with no protection is not good for me...I am no fool, believe me, I always wear something when out in the sun. I know what will happen and I know it will be bad....this was kind of bad...

Though there were no blisters or anything, my legs, ankles and feet pretty much swelled up on top of the sunburn. I did a bit of research and it seems like swelling is a common occurrence. "Granny" and "Sarah" also got a bit of swelling. Mine was way worse though.  I could barely walk by Friday and Saturday, sitting in the car from Anna Maria Island to South Carolina was pretty tough.  By Saturday night I was definitely teetering on the edge of insanity.  I was in pain, exhausted, uncomfortable...all I can say is I learned a lesson about applying and reapplying and reapplying and reapplying and reapplying sunscreen.

By the next day I was on the mend and today, a week after Sunburn 2012 occurred, the pain is gone and all that is left is the unbearable itching that many of you are likely familiar with after a sunburn.Every step I take and every move I make I am dropping DNA all over the place. I really hope the worst is over, but I suspect it is going to take my legs a few more days to get back to normal. As I try to see the positive, I have brand new skin all over the place, so that is probably good, right?

I think the best part of being in Florida was simply the relaxation of it all.  I was really at my wits end before I went and I think I really realized that you need to give yourself a break every once in awhile. I was inspired there and feel energized even now. That is probably a good thing.  I had a great idea for a story and you never know where things like that can take you.

I know this is kind of a boring post...nothing very unusual or funny has happened except the reptilian way I am shedding skin. Have you read the new poetry section? Check it out here.

I have been really into planning my new music blog...I can't decide who to feature first though. Gotye? Rachael Owens? The Autumn Portrait? Bodhi Jones? Someone else?  If you have suggestions, let me know.  I am trying to stick to Indie bands/artists but will certainly consider others. Gotye is about to blow up since his song is going to be on Glee in 2 weeks.

Ahh...what to do, what to do...

Friday, March 23, 2012

Trip to Florida - Last Day in the Sun

Today is our last day in Florida. We are leaving at 6am tomorrow morning. Last day at the beach (I am not going however because I currently am the approximate color of a lobster). We have some shopping to do, last minute souvenirs to buy and a trip to see the new house once again.

It is always hard to leave, but much easier now that I know I can come back at any time (assuming the inspection goes through!).

Off to the shops!

Thursday, March 22, 2012

Trip to Florida - Lucky Morning

Reminder - No animals were harmed in the making of this blog post. Any animal that is mentioned was deceased unless specified.

Went to the beach this morning, then out to breakfast. We have been looking for shells all week, specifically whole sand dollar shells. We have had zero luck until today. We finally found one whole sand dollar shell.  I seriously almost dived into the ocean to get it, but I finally go it. Soaked from my toes to shoulders, we continued to walk down the beach.

About 15 minutes later, we had turned around and headed back. I glanced down into the surf and saw...a starfish...just hanging out in the sand. I called for my dad because I was half afraid of it and I am also terrified of fish so I wanted to make sure there were no fish around. A random man came over with a fluorescent green shirt and no pants. He told me it was alright to pick it up and I should see if it was alive.  It certainly was alive.  It was soft and moving along my palms.  It was an extremely cool experience and nothing like the hard starfish you see in the stores.  It was very pliable and you could see all of it's little feet move.  We took pictures and my dad took it way out into the sea, hopefully safe from harm.. 

Me holding the live starfish.

Not two feet down the shore, I look down and see another starfish...this time, I had no fear and picked it right up. It was hard and not moving, obviously dead. We ended up bringing it back, did some research and have now begun the preservation process.  It was an extremely cool morning and very lucky.  One whole sand dollar shell and two starfish (though one was dead).

Back to the beach today for just a bit.  Mom and dad bought a house down here so there are meetings to go to and papers to sign...all of it needs to be done by tomorrow.  A little wrench in our plans and some things have needed to be left out of our plans, but now that we know we can come down whenever we want, it doesn't seem so bad.

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Trip to Florida - Trip to Johns Pass

After a celebratory evening (my parent's bought a second home down here!) we retired earlier (some of us (not me!) needed to go to bed more than others) than normal. We are back in business and on our way to Johns Pass which is supposedly a great shopping location. It is also supposed to be very fun. All of our plans have gotten turned around due to the house buying extravaganza but all of us are excited.

Who is coming down to FL for vacation??

Here are some pics from yesterday at Siesta Key and my sister Margarita from this morning.

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Trip to Florida - Off to Siesta Key

We had a great morning today. Walk on the beach, went out to breakfast at Ginny & Jane E's then back to the beach for about 2 hours. Back to the house for a quick lunch and cocktails and now off to Siesta Key. I have never been there but I have heard great things about it from "Todd", "Sarah" and my friend Laurel.

Will keep you posted...

Meanwhile we saw a crane in our back yard and I had a delicious margarita. Speaking of margaritas, my sisters Tia and Margarita were able to spend some bonding time with their mom. Pics of our morning are below.

Monday, March 19, 2012

Trip to Florida - No Worries

"Sarah" and "Todd" have been found. No worries.

Trip to Florida - Evening

"Todd" and "Sarah" have officially disappeared. They went for a meeting about a house and have not returned. "Granny" and I were distraught over their disappearance so we went down to the local watering hole and had a drink. Or two. We also took a long walk where "Granny" found a boat with her name on it. "Todd" and "Sarah" are still not home so we have a difficult question to answer...margaritas or piƱa coladas?

Trip to Florida - Day at the Beach

I haven't blogged today because it's hard to see my screen in the gorgeous Florida sunshine. Lazy day today on the beach, dinner at the Rod and Reel, now onto the bar and wherever the trolley takes us. Until next time, enjoy these pics.

Sunday, March 18, 2012

Trip to Florida - First Day

The first day is coming to a close and we are having cocktail hour. Productive day of beach-going, shopping at the pier and house hunting. Bout to take a walk in the beautiful Florida night.

Trip to Florida - Blogging on the Beach

Ok. I am not actually on the beach. My intention was to actually blog on the beach but it was way too sunny. Sucks, right? :)

So I came back to the house and blogging here. Just wanted to share some photos. Had a great morning on the first day. We took a walk around town then hit the beach.

Margarita had a rough morning though. She fell out of a chair then was forced to take a walk. She needed a rest.

Friday, March 16, 2012

Trip to Florida - Rest for the Night

We have gone from Ohio to South Carolina and all are tired.

We might go for a nice walk in a bit and plan to be on the road tomorrow by 730, off to sunny FL.

Trip to Florida - Lunch

Stopped in VA for lunch. Already a better experience than WV. It is cold and rainy but looking better the further south we go.

Sandwiches...someone's looks a little sparse.

Trip to Florida- The First Injury

We are officially in West Virginia.

We were in the state for less than 10 minutes and I fell over a stone bench. When I say fall...I mean fall. See photo below. My entire leg hurts and it is getting more bruised by the minute.

My family thought I faked it because it was so ridiculous. In fact, they all walked away from the scene of the crime. Meanwhile, I was hunched over trying not to cry in public.

Of course I don't blame them. I would laugh and walk away if I saw it too. Obviously thus far I am not a fan of West Virginia. Here's to a better visit.

Trip to Florida - On Our Way

8:15 am on March 16th and we have been on the road for 2 hours. Four humans, two dogs and a Cadillac that is filled to capacity has entered Guernsey County Ohio. We have already stopped for a bathroom/coffee break and back on the road again. Nothing of significance has occurred thus far which is good. I am learning a lot about how people raised their kids in West Virginia back in the day.

My sisters are sleeping ( the dogs) Chloe has already had a good report (she is staying with her Aunt Donna) and we are settled in to go to South Carolina today.

"Granny" has just asked if I am twatting. (tweeting)

Margarita looks thrilled.

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Updates...It's Time for an Announcement

I have all missed me.  I have been extremely busy.  Working 14 hours a day is no fun and quite frankly, for the birds.

In my "free" time, I have been working behind the scenes on my blog. I have added two new sections. Though a computer genius likely would have been able to do this in a day, it took me several weeks of blood, sweat, tears and pleas to my friend from college Liz to help me. (Check out her AMAZING blog here: WomanlyWoman) Finally I have broken through with my remedial html/web design skills and figured out how to do what I wanted to do with this.

Though I will absolutely keep this blog up, I also have added two new sections to this blog. One is up and running, the other will be soon (after my vacation!).

If you look above, you will see two new tabs. One is called "The Flip Side", the other "Have You Heard This?". Both are dedicated to two of the loves of my life, poetry and music. "The Flip Side" is amateur poetry.  I only choose the most raw and thoughtful poetry I can find and I invite anyone reading this to submit things to me. You can even do it anonymously if you like by e-mailing here. (Just don't put your name!) If I like it, I will add it. I have gut wrenching poems, awesome quotes and micropoetry. Please read it. It is good for your soul. Let me know what you like and what you don't.

The second part of this new venture is known as "Have You Heard This?". In my real free time, I scour the internet for new music and I have found A LOT recently. I want to share with the world and feature some of these awesome bands that I have come across in my drunken stupors research. I promise, for any music lovers out there, it will be updated soon.

In the meantime, keep watching this space.  In two days I am off to Florida with "Todd", "Sarah" and "Granny" is sure to be a good time and I will surely be live blogging our adventures, including the two day drive in the Caddy...If you want to be notified when I post, please add your e-mail address on the right side of the screen.

For those of you who want a quick update, Chloe is great, getting ready to stay with her Aunt Donna while I am out of town. I have given up on love, so dating stories may be few and far between in the future. (Though I still want to have children, so perhaps I will share the plan my mom and I came up with.)  I finally have the beginnings of a novel going, which if your remember, was my New Year's Resolution. I am still following my favorite soap opera (AKA the politics of the US.  All of you Republicans are fascinating me with your mixed up musings. Santorum?  Really?) and have been sleeping better the past 2 weeks. (Yes, my insomnia cycle is over...for now)

For now, please read some will mean the world to those who have poured their souls into these pieces. Like I said above, it is good for your soul.

I will be back soon...Florida in three days!

Monday, February 6, 2012

Day in Review - Mother/Daughter Bonding with "Sarah"

What started out as a group outing on Friday night turned into a fun and exciting mother/daughter bonding weekend with "Sarah". I know what you are could I possibly top the fun I have on a normal weekend when I sit on my ass doing nothing but working and talking to Chloe. (For the record, my weekends have gotten much more enjoyable now that I have stopped writing the Plantar Fasciitis articles I worked on for six months...on a side note, if anyone has a problem with Plantar Fasciitis I have 400 articles that may be of assistance)

"Sarah" and I, along with my sister and cousin Niki had planned to go see a tarot card reader named Reverend Elizabeth. Yes, she is a real reverend and yes, she was freakin' awesome. I know there are certainly varied opinions when it comes to tarot cards and "seers" in general, but since I am a liberal and don't tell people what is "right" or "wrong" when it comes to belief's, if you don't want to read about it, I won't be offended. I also understand that some people will say it is "pish posh" and simply a waste of time and you just don't believe it. That is fine too. I certainly understand your side as well. What I will say is I have done this before with amazing results that actually happened and I was willing to do it again. Long story short, my sister bailed and Niki had a sick kid, so it ended up being my mom and I.

She had never done one of these things before and though she was nervous, she did it anyway. I made her go first so she couldn't run away, in fact. I tried to listen in on the conversation, but I could only hear certain things. We were at a coffee shop and there were people machines making foam and I was momentarily distracted by a few text messages and the latest issue of In Style.

I did hear her talking about my mom's work a lot.  I also heard her say something about Florida. My ears really perked up when Rev. Elizabeth started talking about my mom's Scorpio daughter. (You may know her as me) I heard some phrases like "really successful" "good things happening", "a lot of good things". Before I knew it, my mom was done and it was my turn.

Making it as short as possible, this tarot card reading started with me shuffling the cards. She laid them out and started talking. There were several times I had to catch my breath and one time where my hand went to my mouth in an "OMG" experience. Some of the highlights were I need more focus on my creative writing, I am going through a bit of a crap period but things will lighten up at the end of February. I will have a relationship with another Scorpio, but it is not true love, I will make a move, travel a lot and that the news and news journalism will be very significant to the future. This came up several times, in fact, throughout the entire reading. She also talked a lot about my personality and how I have so much Scorpio in me that other people just don't understand me very well. I know what I want (I do), I do what I want to do (I do) and there is someone out there for me, but it will be very surprising that we get together. There was more, of course, but it's private. :)  After the reading, we went to dinner, had a margarita, then went home and drank a bottle of wine.

Saturday was Amish country. For those of you who have never been, it is a fascinating thing. Driving around the area, you almost feel out of place. You really need to pay attention when driving so you don't get too close to the horse and buggy that is probably on the side of the road and walking around, you need to make sure not to step in a pile of horse shit...literally. It really is kind of like stepping back in time and it is difficult not to stare and take it all in.

"Sarah" and her new friend

There are two things that the Amish do really well...they make good cheese and make great bread. I ate a lot of cheese, drank more wine, almost stepped in horse poop a few times and bought a lot of tea. One of my favorite things about Amish country is all of the natural remedies they have for whatever ails you.  I am one of those people who is much more likely to choose eastern medicine or home remedies over medications. We are an over medicated society I have found that I can heal just as fast using natural remedies when sick, if not faster, than those who take antibiotics at the first sign of a sniffle. This weekend I was on a tea kick...I bought 4 different kinds. I have tried one of them, the sassafras tea...there are actual twigs in the tea. It was SO good. It has 0.8 calories per cup and was absolutely delicious.

I am starting a high protein, low carb diet tomorrow morning, so this could be the perfect thing. I also bought some Chinese diet tea made out of things I cannot pronounce nor spell here since they are Chinese characters. I also got some rooibos and chamomile.

Wish me luck.  No more wine for awhile...sad days...I don't know how I am possibly going to write creatively without being half drunk...just kidding! Who wants to be my muse? I am accepting applications as of right now.

By the way, new Absolutely Fabulous tonight! 

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Day in Review - Celebrations All Around

 Before I even start this post, my sweet (or bad...depending on your view point) dog Chloe is featured on a very special post written by my dear friend and confidant Cletis Stump. Check it out if you like dogs: Dogs of Twitter #1

This is the story of two celebrations...

It seems like it is a time of celebration in my life...hopefully you have something to celebrate as well.  One of these celebrations I have been counting down the days for...another was sprung upon me via a surprise text message.

Let's be real though...just because something should be celebrated, doesn't mean I want to hear about it.

Let's start with that first....ever since my parents "Sarah" and "Todd" have learned to text, I have enjoyed a new way to communicate with them.  It is great that I can just text Todd and say "I need new windshield wipers"....3 months later, like magic....they appear.  (Of course I have to drive an hour to get them, but I am not complaining...just stating a fact) Texting with them is great...really...

I know a lot of people make fun of their parents texting, but I will not be one of them. (They have had their moments, don't get me wrong!)

I enjoy texts. I feel like it is the easiest way to say what you need to say when you need to say it.  I think I am probably pretty no-nonsense and just want to get to the point in most situations.  I don't like a lot of dribble, drama or drawn out stories.  Get to the point. (This reminds me of my friend Cher...who never gets to the point. Don't be a Cher...get to the point and lets go get a drink)

So back to my parents texting..."Todd" sent me a text on January 26th...just a few days said this...

"happy birthday today is the day you were conceived" read that DAD...sent me a TEXT...telling me that it was the anniversary of my CONCEPTION.  Let me just walk you through the thoughts that went through my head...

"What does that say?"


"Is that really what is says?"


"Conception?  No...."

"Oh shit...."

At that point I started laughing uncontrollably. It took everything I had to pick up my phone and hit "Send".

Of course, he picked up with a chuckle...and I could hear "Sarah" cackling in the background.  They thought it was hilarious.

Through my extreme laughter I told them to NEVER, EVER, EVER, EVER, EVER, EVER, EVER, EVER mention this to me again. I believe I said something like "I did NOT need to know about that nastinest"

They brought it up a few days later when I went to do laundry...still chuckling...still bringing the awkwardness upon me...still insuring embarrassing and awkward moments after all these years...

So yes...the first thing we are celebrating is my conception.  Hurrah for the Blizzard of 78....Let's just move on to the real celebration...

Today, February 1st, is my 1 year anniversary....of no smoking.  No cigarettes.  The last cigarette I had was the morning of February 1st, 2011.  I can't believe it has been that long.  Let's rewind for a bit...

I won't get into a long, inspirational either believe it, or you don't.  You think I am crazy or you don't. I could care less.

I had a dream and my dream became a prophetic dream. There was a stranger in my dream that my departed grandmother (who was in my dream) introduced me my dream. My grandmother told me this stranger would be significant to me. The stranger in my dream became the stranger in front of my very real eyes that said "Don't smoke". I listened to a stranger. The stranger inspired me and inspires me to this day.  I thank God for the stranger every day...I pray for the stranger every day. I consider the stranger a sort of hero or dare I say friend, though it's certainly not mutual.

Every time I feel weak and feel like I want to smoke, I think of the stranger. I love the stranger for this. That inspiration is amazing. The stranger has no idea what they did for me.  Perhaps someday I can say thank you in person. If nothing else, we will share a love of music, politics, news and damn...we both have the most amazing eyes you have ever seen...

Like I said...believe the story or don't...judge if you like.  I don't care.  I don't smoke anymore and it shouldn't matter why or how I quit.

What matters is I don't smoke...and I gained 20 pounds because I don't smoke.

I think I blocked those first weeks out.  They were a swirl of sleeping pills, Dum Dums and Peanut Butter M and Ms. When you sleep, you don't have cravings and when you are awake and have cravings, candy makes it dandy...not only makes it a bit less like you are standing in the fires of hell, but you have candy, so it's better.Make sense?
Semi-Sustainable Food

Candy...especially M and Ms...are not fat free.  when you are sustained and living on chocolate, fake peanut butter and a candy shell that melts in your mouth and not your hands, you gain weight.

I would say I probably put on 20 pounds....I have, over the year, lost about 5, but I am still 15 pounds heavier than I was before and it sucks the big one.

As I told "Sarah" the other night, I could probably lose more if I laid off the wine a bit, but hey, a girl has to have some vices in life, right? I cannot live without some substance running through my veins. Luckily my hours at the gym each week burns the same amount of calories that I consume from wine.

I eat very well (healthy), I fry nothing, I don't eat fast food...

I drink wine and I love every drop. I don't smoke, I don't do drugs, I don't have addictions (music doesn't count).  None of that helps me lose these 15-20 pounds though. Sometimes I honestly consider picking up the cigarettes again.  I know what you are going to say...don't do it.  I know the stranger would haunt me, but I know the weight would come off.

Why can't I just go on the 1990's Gwyneth Paltrow diet of a bottle of gin and 2 packs a day? (For the record, I didn't smoke 2 packs a day...EVER). It seems very easy...

It is just my's playing tricks on me.  It has played tricks on me every day since February 1st, 2011. It tells me that I should smoke...

Every day I tell it "No".

It may be a fleeting thought, but it is always there.

I can pick out smokers easily...I track them like a bloodhound.

I breathe a little bit deeper around them..I want to just smell the smoke.  Some ex-smokers can't stomach the  I love it...but only the fresh smoke smell...not the stale smell. There is a difference. Think I'm gross?  Maybe...

If you have never smoked and think I am gross, I honestly don't care for your opinion. If you are someone Kellie Jones, who was a HUGE help during this process, and for the record gone through the same thing, I may be more inclined to hear you talk about my grossness or my fatness.

For anyone reading this who smokes.  No, I will never, ever judge you. I will never hound you to quit. I won't think anything different about you. I will love you, cigarette and all. (I may ask to just smell your hair) I know how sucky it is to be constantly hounded and reminded that cigarettes are bad. Do people think we don't know that? Do people think we don't know what they do?  Do people honestly think propping up a diseased lung is going to stop the cravings? Hell, I used to smoke and look at diseased lungs at the same time.

The addiction is is holds on with an iron grip. I don't know how I pulled it away. I don't know how I stopped.

I don't think I did it alone.

Think? No, I know I didn't do it alone. I had something I can't explain. Something more powerful than me.

It has been a year.

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Day in Review - Facebook Unfriending and Politics

I'll be honest....I do a bit a Facebook stalking. (Some may call this "creeping") Don't judge all do it. You know what I see that Facebook has some "great" friend suggestions for you and you know who these people are, but you don't really like them and you certainly don't want them all up in your life, so you don't just stalk their profile a bit.

So I was innocently doing this today...and all of a sudden I notice that someone I thought was my Facebook friend was friends with someone I was stalking...and I was sad.

I was sad that I didn't make the cut on their friend list.  I was sad that our past friendship meant nothing.  I was sad that this person who de-friended me (we will call him "Dan"..of course this is a pseudonym) used to hang out with my mom when she briefly worked at the schools. I had been to his house, we used to hang out in similar groups in school and I even had a crush on him for awhile. The "high school self" that is in my personality was crushed. "Dan" de-friended me and I didn't even realize it. But the worst was yet to come.

This denial was tough, but what was even tougher was the fact that it brought up an even worse memory.  My first "de-friend" ever...I will never forget it and it still feels like a raw cut in my heart when I think about it. When you are friends with someone from childhood, knew their entire family, absolutely adored this person and supported them through everything they had gone through..(for the record, it was a lot)...then they de-friend hurts.  It cuts deep. It still brings pain after all these years. He is still friends with some of my lifelong best friends and my photo albums and boxes are filled with pictures of him from our youth. He was one of my first friends ever...and one of the first to de-friend me on Facebook.

Ok...I am being a bit sarcastic and dramatic here.  One of these "de-friending" incidents I could care less about ("Dan"). The other one did upset me, but only because I seriously thought we were friends.

Facebook is intertwined into all of our lives. (Or maybe just mine) I have laughed, cried, cheered and jeered things that I have seen on Facebook. It is an amazing way to keep in touch, a great way to keep up on what is going on with your friends and family and a super way to stalk...errr

We love Facebook!

In other news, the paparazzi is hot on my trail.  (Don't get excited...this is the ONE member of the CLEVELAND paparazzi) You have surely heard of the lone paparazzi attack at my gym which happened two weeks ago, right? Today, I had another experience with the CLE paparazzi.  I was innocently driving down West 9th today and got stuck at a light. I was doing what most people do when stopped at a light. (I think...) I was playing with my iPod and checking my phone when I saw a flash. I looked up into my rear view mirror and there is a man with a his car...and he is taking pictures.

Before you ask, he was not taking a photo of my license plate nor was he a cop. I have no bumper stickers or anything that stands out on my car. (Typical silver SUV that you see driving down the highways and biways) I don't have hilarious vanity plates. (Nor would I ever get them...they are called vanity plates for a reason, people!) Let's get back to the story.

After I saw the flash and saw the man in the car behind me, I just stared into my mirror and observed.  Once again, he raised his camera and took a photo. No flash this time. For anyone who is familiar for the downtown CLE area, I was at the light on W 9th and Superior, turning towards Huron.  The camera was pointed upwards...if I was just a casual observer, I would say he was taking a picture of the sky...which was grey...and had nothing significant about it. The only thing it could be is that I have gotten too famous as a CLE celebrity and now have the paparazzi following me.

I didn't have make-up on, nor had I done much with my hair.  I am sure you will see the picture in next week's "Scene Magazine". I am probably going to have to leave town and I swear I will start wearing make-up each time I step outside.Can't take anymore chances.

You know I am being highly dramatic again, right?  I just want to make sure because I hate getting nasty-grams about this blog.

Who watched the State of the Union? I did...per usual...though I have to say with the invention of Facebook and Twitter, it is certainly more difficult to pay attention to what the President is saying. I have lost all faith in government so I was much more concerned with Hillary Clinton's headband and John Boehner's tan. Dude...he is from is winter time...there is barely enough sun for human's to survive, not to mention enough to get a tan. (FAKE, FAKE, FAKE)

I am a politics geek and don't miss these things. Nor do I miss debates, even when they are on the GOP side. It fascinates me, I have to admit. Judge me as you will, I love them and I won't stop watching. I even make Chloe watch them and even dress her for the occasion. Tonight she is wearing a blue sweater.

Do I even have to mention that even though I am certainly Liberal and tend to vote Democrat, that I am not a huge Obama fan? Hell, I voted for Hillary in the primaries and would vote for her again. (This is another attempt to limit the nasty-grams I may receive from this post about how bad Obama this case, I may even agree on some things)

HOWEVER...I don't care who you are...rather you love or hate him, he is the President of this country and deserves some type of respect.  (Before you send a nasty-gram to me, no, I did not like George Bush's policies in any way, shape or form, but I still respected his position.) God help you if you say one word to me and you did not vote in the last election. You have absolutely no right to say anything to anyone if you didn't get off your lazy ass and vote. If you want to complain about this President and didn't vote, spout off...but don't spout off to me. I would have more respect for George Bush than you, and that is saying something. I am more than willing to debate ideals with someone who actually VOTED for McCain and *ahem* Palin. (Oh I sound like Newt...debate, debate, debate)

Ugh...enough politics now, even for me.

On that note...who is registered to vote? Time is running out. If you want to register to vote, go here: 

Til next time...

Monday, January 9, 2012

Day in Review - Resolutions and Relevations

Welcome to the first post of 2012.  So far the year is going well, though I realize we have only gone through nine days. Not much has changed. I am still sitting on my sofa with Chloe. I am in my pajamas with a glass of wine and it feels like 2011.  Sometimes, at least for me, it takes a bit for a new year to settle into my bones.

Who has made a resolution?  Mine is to focus on ONE...just ONE of my ideas for a novel...I have three...and write. Other than that, I really have no resolutions. My mom wants my resolution to be meet a nice guy and have a baby but I told her I gave up on love. She has her own resolutions that I am fully supporting.

My 2011 resolution was to have more fun and I think I did pretty well with that.  Though there were moments that were not so fun, such as the first weeks after I quit smoking and when I got roofied. I was, in my defense, trying to have fun when I got roofied, but I don't remember if I actually did. The year was certainly met with surprises and things that tried to get me down, but I think I was fairly successful in the fun factor which means I hope to continue the trend.

Christmas and the New Year celebrations were great. I feel very blessed for the time I was able to spend with my family and for the giving and receiving that went on. Some of my favorite gifts were my new Coach purse, my ornament with Chloe's picture on it, my new dish towels, a new tube of Burt's Bee's lip balm and my new Camelbak water bottle...

I have wanted this water bottle for a long time, but I am too cheap to spend the $25 it cost, so I took the opportunity to request it in the family gift exchange where we all chose names and had a limit of...$25 - $30. My cousin Jason got my name, his wife Katie sent me an e-mail asking what I wanted, I gave her exact specifications and soon, I had my brand new water bottle in my hands.

My new water bottle

I had to prepare the bottle before using it since it has a filter. I had to totally disassemble the bottle, wash the entire bottle, rinse the filter and re-assemble it in order to use it, but once I did, I knew I was in love....until a thought crossed my mind...

See, this has a bite valve on it.  This means, that when you want to take a drink, you need to bite down on the valve. The valve opens up and you suck the water into your mouth. I had been using the water bottle for a few days and getting used to the "bite then suck" motion. I became very interested in the bite valve...and I swear...I have no idea why I thought this...but I was...well...manipulating the bite valve with my fingers trying to figure out how it worked and then it hit me....this thing looked like a vagina.

I won't go into the particular details, but if you have a water bottle with a bite valve, take a look at it and you will see what I mean. Hmmm...perhaps it is only me but when I drink out of it, still, to this day....that thought briefly crosses my mind...

Speaking of resolutions and vaginas....

Many people have the resolution to go to the gym and that has been apparent at Planet Fitness the past few days. It is packed. I like to go in the mid morning hours and usually I have my pick of treadmills and bikes, but it has been more crowded as usual which leads me to a story. Picture it...Planet Fitness, 2012.....

It was crowded on this particular morning at the gym.  I was having a good workout...for me, anyway. I had already done a nice warm up walk/jog on the treadmill and had totally faced my fears and gotten on the elliptical for the first time since the unfortunate "fall off the elliptical" incident several years ago. I felt really damn good about myself as I walked to the back of the gym to focus on my arms. I was sweaty and gross, but I didn't care...I had met one of my fears head on and came out on the other side totally unscathed. It was a triumphant moment and even though my muscles were tired and weak...there was a spring in my step and attitude as I pulled down the weights and felt the biceps burn. I then moved over to the low row weights and it all fell apart....

No, this in not me, but it is like the machine I was using....

I was sitting on the bench and doing my was then that I saw the suspicious man with the hat.  He was standing across the room and had his cell phone out. I saw his eyes darting between me and the cell phone...then I saw a flash and a smirk...his eyes darted up one more time and he walked away.

Of course I was A) totally self conscious B) wondering why he was making fun of me C) wondering if I had a hole in the crotch of my pants and my...ummm...chichi (or whatever you would like to call it, I suppose vagina is the politically correct word) was showing  D) thinking I was doing the row wrong and he was taking the picture to show his friends E) totally ugly and fat F) completely angry

So much for my workout...I just quit and walked back into the locker room. I had to check my crotch/chichi to make sure it wasn't making an inappropriate appearance (no hole in my pants, by the way) and just put on my coat and walked out.

This still bothers me for two, because the guy seriously took a picture of me without my permission and two because my first thought was that something was wrong with me, that I am ugly and that he was making fun of me. Perhaps I should choose to add a new build up my self esteem. A part of me is embarrassed that I even felt those things. Another part of me is angry for letting him make me feel that way.  A third part of me is afraid it is true and a fourth part of me is trying to push all of the low and negative thoughts out of my head. There is a fifth part, as well, that is just happy that I didn't turn Planet Fitness into an amateur porn palace by flashing my hoo ha all over the place.

I guess tomorrow is another day and I need to go back to the gym.  I was supposed to go today, but since the weekend was a little crazy and I pulled a muscle in my left Maximus Gluteus from being a bowler/dancing machine for hours on Saturday, I opted not to go. (Seriously, it was an effort to make it from my bed to desk.  I needed an ass massage, but Chloe wouldn't do it and since I gave up on love, I have no boyfriend to do it.) It is still painful today, but hopefully tomorrow will be better and I can get back to work. 

Until next time, my friends...

PS...if a post mentioning vaginas offends you, I apologize. I figured since I had a penis post, it was only fair...