There is a boil on my....

I got into HR by accident. I was one of those people who had a degree but had no idea what I wanted to do career-wise. I tried a few things, but nothing ever really stuck well with me. I was working as a reporter in a radio station and one day, I decided, I hated it. I went to a temp agency and started working temp jobs for a few months. The last temp job I had was as a receptionist for a metal stamping factory. About 3 weeks after I started, the company hired me on full-time as the HR Assistant and I just fell in love with it. The manager I worked for, John, was a 100% total SLOB. He would have just pile after pile of papers stacked all around his office. When the "powers that be" of the company would come by, the President of the company would make sure we kept John's office closed it was so bad. Five months after I started there, John was terminated and I was made the Human Resources Manager.

The thing about HR is you have to have a certain combination of compassion and sterness. Not only are you the disciplinarian, but you are also the company counselor. Everyday is different too, which is why I like it. I can walk in the door in the morning and never know what my day might bring. Sure...I might have a plan written down on paper, but 75% of the time that plan changes. Things happen all the time and you are the one responsible for the recruiting, the hiring, the terminations, the discipline, the settling people down, bringing people up...it never ends, its always different, and it is exciting. There are days where, as any HR Manager/HR Director would agree, you walk in and think...I have nothing to do today....and there are others where you think, HOW IN THE HELL AM I GOING TO GET ALL OF THIS DONE!!!

The other thing I like about HR is you get the "dirt" before the gossip starts, so you are always a good source for people to go to to get the "real" story. Unfortunately there is that "ethics" and "confidentiality" thing that makes it difficult to TELL the real story.

People tell you a lot too. More than you want to hear most times. Here are a few examples:

"FMLA"

An employee walks into my office and asks for FMLA paperwork for a medical condition he has. I get the paperwork together, NOT asking at that point the reason, hand it to him and say "I hope everything is OK" He looks at me, straight in the face and says..."Well, my balls are the size of melons, so no, everything is not ok."

"Pro-Life or Pro-Choice"

I had a visit with an Executive Human Resources Director from our corporate office to go over some paperwork before an audit we were having. I hear a knock on my office door and said "Come in!" Two employees walked in, both young women, one at 20, one at 24. The 24 year old looks at me and says...."Does our health insurance cover abortions?"

"Boils"

On of our overnighters came into my office in the middle of the afternoon. I was kind of surprised to see him because, well...he works overnight. I greet him, ask how he is doing and he said "I can't work tonight." I ask him why. He says " I have a boil on my ass. I have a doctor's note."

I SWEAR this JUST happened as I am typing this....

Knock on the door.

"Come in"

Door opens.

One of our Sales Managers...."Um, the hallway smells like cat piss. Im goinng out on a call, but can you tell housekeeping?"

Closes door.