Day in Review - Some May Say I'm a Dreamer

 Lets have a blog post, shall we?  How is everyone out there?  Excellent, I hope! I have been busy, but I am happy to report I have been busy for a reason!  For those of you who don't know, I have signed on to a big writing project. For the first time EVER, writing is bringing in a majority of my income.  It's a huge step and an exciting thing for me. I am learning a lot and focusing on some skills that can take me far. (SEO anyone?)

Besides writing, I have been up to few other things and having some random ideas. Maybe it's all good...you know, that creative process...

Anywho...Chloe and I are adjusting to living with each other again.  She was gone for almost two weeks on vacation at my parents house (You know...Sarah and Todd...) and I was babysitting another dog. Once she came home she brought visitors.  Two chihuahuas...I was watching my "sisters" Maggie and Tia...I know I have mentioned them before. They are the chihuahua's that have taken the place of my sister and I in my parents home. They are fat, mean and bark too much, but as their designated babysitter and older sister, I try to have patience with them. This time, however...my patience hit it's breaking point. 

Maggie, Tia and Chloe (L-R)

See...normally Maggie is a good girl and Tia is the problem child. However, this time the tables were turned....Long story short, I was in the bathroom beautifying myself (I know...I don't need to...). Tia and Chloe were wrestling with each other on the floor. I finished up my hair (Chloe and Tia still next to me)...took two steps outside of the bathroom...and it hit me...I smelled dog poop. 

I slowly walked into the living room, following the putrid scent and what do I see?  This....

Yes...that is POOP on my shoes!!!!!

 As you can see from the picture above, this was not an ideal situation. I honestly didn't know if I should laugh or cry. (I decided on both.) I immediately took this picture and sent to to my mom to show her what her sweet little dog did...as a side note, if you look closely there is a dark area in the upper left hand corner of the photo...that is PEE.  As soon as she shit on my shoe, she squatted and pissed right next to it...

For those of you wondering if I was abusing her by not taking her outside, she gone out approximately an hour before this...peed and pooped!  This was spite, I tell you...SPITE!


Now that I have that off my chest and the chihuahua's out of my home, it is just Chloe and I again.  I think she is on a hunger strike because I won't feed her moist food (I think it gives her diarrhea) but she gets it when she visits her grandparents. (They don't have to clean up her poop with a little baggie!) Apparently she feels the Beneful I supply in Lakewood isn't good enough for her Caesar refined palate. (She is giving me the stink eye now because I asked her if she liked it.  Maybe I should change her food)  Has anyone else noticed a poop theme tonight?

Moving away from poop...I had an awesome idea today.  My Aunt Debi lives in Albuquerque and I really want to go see her. I was looking at flights last night and the absolute cheapest I could find was $278 plus tax, so at least $300, plus spending money once I get there.  That's a lot for a struggling, but fabulous writer...enter FABULOUS idea...have you heard of those people who do things and go on these adventures like blogging their way across America?  Well I could take a road trip to Albuquerque and blog it! I could take Chloe and a random friend like Pippa Middleton and blog our adventures...you know, we would stop at places like the biggest ball of twine, etc.  I think it's a great idea!  All I need is a sponsor!  Anyone interested?  :)

Two more things before I sign off...I want to give a big shout out to my girl Jeannette for looking over my dating profile...hopefully it will help. So far the only takers I have gotten is a guy who looks like Janet Reno and a guy named "OhioStalion"....

I want to leave you today with a tweet from Joy Behar...love her or hate her, she is witty...this made me choke when I read it I was laughing so hard "Palin told reporters George Washington was her favorite founding father--and Weezie Jefferson was her favorite first lady."

 Til next time, my friends...

Day in Review - What Would Pippa Do?

I want to start this post by saying a huge "THANK YOU!" to all of the people who shared my last post with their friends. I really think it's important to pay attention when you are out and about getting funky and dancing like a rock star....or like Pippa Middleton....

I have become a mini-celebrity on the Facebook page of the establishment where the incident went down.  I made a post about watching your drinks...it was deleted about an hour later, but in the mean time I have gotten several messages asking about the situation and they made a post on their wall about sleazy guys and keeping your drinks close to you. 

I have to say...it was very strange to lose time like that.  Even up to yesterday I was a bit confused about what the date was.  Luckily my mother reminded me about Mother's Day on Sunday! I thought I still had another week.  Speaking of my mother...I will make a quick segue to the Palin family....so who has seen Bristol's face lift?  If she even tries to deny it I will dress up as a clown and walk through Public Square...well wait..we KNOW she is going to deny it, but COME ON!!!!  She looks like she used the same surgeon as Kenny Rogers did.  Jennifer Grey anyone?????

Another thing I miss when I was "not of this world" (though I can't really say where I was!) was the capture of Osama Bin Laden. I have to say, my mom was hilarious...she called me on Tuesday just to make sure I knew about it...honestly though, I had no idea it had happened until midway through my Monday morning! I was PISSSSSSSSED! Not because of it happening, of course, but because I wasn't privy to the breaking news!  For someone who is a humongous news buff, missing the biggest news story of the decade really hurt. 

Another thing I didn't get a chance to mention was my feelings on the royal wedding.  I laughed....at Beatrice's hat....I cried....at the ceremony...and I almost threw up....again, at Beatrice's hat...(they kept showing it).  I admit, I have always been a huge royal fan...I cried when Princess Diana passed away. This was a big day for me and luckily I didn't miss it.  Chloe was a little angry with me though, since I made her get up with me and made her wear a little tiara.  I thought that was a fabulous idea and was going to send the pictures to the Today Show...until I saw 500 pictures of people who had made THEIR dogs wear tiara's too....so I erased them all, sulked and watched the festivities for about 5 hours...

The final thing I need to say is about "Glee"....I know, I know, some of you don't watch it, but seriously...I don't know if I have become more  compassionate or more "feeling" since I was "out of my mind", but it seriously broke my little heart when Santana was singing to Brittany....I don't know why I love them together so much.  I am also a big Finchel fan, so I am of course seeing the potential of them getting back together....Fondue For Two was HILARIOUS!!!!!!

Ok...signing off for now...I have a few things to do before my favorite Thursday night show "True Crime with Aphrodite Jones".